My Diary page - 7

How to start this blog. Not clear in my mind. But somewhere I shud start. One month back, this happened. One of the worst days for me in this year. I was assigned with some task. My PL, she explained me everything regarding the issue . thing is she explained me around 100 things in a sequence without a pause, with her extraordinary fluent english. I have a very limited knowledge on business. And this gal made use of many business related terms in her words. I ve actually missed her flow at the very beginning. But gave a nod to whatever she was telling till the end. . I know, whatever she says I ll never understand. Since one year I ve been facing the same kind of situation. I thot this was one of them. I was confident enuf that , by referring KT docs, I can get what this issue was all about and what she was actually trying to say and what actually she wants from me. Thing is I did not properly understand what was I actually supposed to do. But was in an assumption that, I can understand once the work progresses. This assumption was a mistake. Delivery date was approaching. I ve done analysis, coding part also is done. I ve asked her to review. She said coding is fine and gave a nod for testing. There were around 4 scenarios to be tested. I ve tested three of them. The fourth one is slightly less complicated one relatively when compared to the other three. But the thing is I was not sure if what I am doing is correct regarding the fourth scenario. So to make it clear, I went to her as I was having a doubt. Just to get a confirmation on what I was trying to test is correct. For this She shouted at me saying “Did u understand what I was trying to say you the other day??? When u did not understand, u shud have told me that day itself. Ok leave it, I ll do it. u can leave”. One thing to mention. It actually is not a complicated issue. It’s a chumma marval. She can in a gentle manner say me. If I was going wrong. I knew, she voluntarily has done this. What ever might be the reason, I was completely down that day. On that day, it was Friday actually, this incident happened around 3 in the afternoon. I ve done nothing since then. I was staring at monitor till 8. Completely disturbed. After all she is my PL. First time for these 2 years, one gal commented my work.


In response to this, after a week, I have put a mail to my friends Ashok, Deepak, saying how worst things are going for me. Meanwhile I ve completed a new marval for which client was really happy about my analysis. I ve received appreciation for that. All the managers, onsite people, my PL, team mates every one were in the loop. I ve actually went to cafeteria that time.


Gayathri, she sits behind me(my projectmate), she said “hey rajendra, congrats”.


I was surprised. “Why? What ‘s the matter? Did she scold me again” .


hey come on. Look at at your inbox, she said.


I ve unlocked my system. My inbox has 8 mails, and that too in a short span of 10 minutes. Appreciation mails from managers, saying ‘Great job”.


Nice feeling, to receive appreciation for what you have done.


She(my PL ) came to me. My facial expressions slightly changed.


She said “Congrats, keep up the good work”. It was a relief kind of thing for me.


I m planning to purchase laptop. It costs around 40K. I don’t have money in hand right now. I don’t want to ask my parents for money. I want to purchase it on my own. I am planning to take a loan. First time in my life, I am doing a thing in my life, without informing my parents . icici personal loan candidate, stupid guy, when I asked him if he can give loan, he said “Sir, we have stopped giving loans to Satyam people. If that guy was infront of me, I would have murd**ed him. Idiot. These icici people, in those days were behind me, “Sir, take credit card sir, no extra charges, ur credit limit is 75K sir. This is a special offer, exclusively for sat yam people bolke”. Stupids, how they are talking now. CITI bank guy called me up, saying bank was ready to give me loan.

some things really happen

My train was at 6 15. Charminar express from chennai. I have to go to Hyderabad. I ve started from office at 4 30. By the time I ve reached the station, it was around 6 10. Much to my discomfort, I ve found charminar express was about to leave from platform 10. Platform 10 will be towards the other side of entrance. I ran towards the train. Thank god, it was still there.
I started looking at the chart of my compartment, to see if I can find any gal near to my seat no. I can find only one female name in that list, Deepthi, 23. I prayed to god(that she shud be beautiful), and walked towards my seat.

I can see a gal in my bay. She sat beside the window. It was winter season. She sat in her seat, with a blanket over her legs, she was protecting herself from chillness. She was reading novel. The first glance I had at her, I am clean bould by her looks. I felt “Na jeevitham danyam aipoindira. Emanna figure aa. Adbutham” . I found my seat to be the lower birth on the other side. “Wow, how fortunate I am” . I felt like I am the luckiest human being in this world.

I called up one of my friends, narrated the entire scenario. “ Stupid,how lucky ur??? Is she really so great??? That’s ok. But do not miss this chance. Flirt her to extreme. No one is around you . so whatever you do is ok. Do not miss this opportunity. “ he replied. I am not sure, if she understood our conversation. Train started.

My luggage was not too heavy. I ve placed it on the upper berth and sat infront of her. Only we two were present in our bay. I ve seen for 10 minutes if some one else could come. Luckily no one came. I felt a bit relaxed. Now actual desire started. My ideas were revolving with rocket speed. “ how to flirt her???how to impress her???how will she respond???” infact many things.

Some how I shud start a chat with her. But, She was concentrating on novel. I kept looking outside thru window. Every now and then, I had a look at her. Eventually she noticed. Similar scenes repeated. I donno how many times, but more than 10 times. I cursed myself saying “ Stupid, you ll never get such a chance. Cute Gal in front of you, with no one around you, what the hell you are doing”. 3 hours passed away. For these 3 hours, I ve looked at her infinite times. When she looked at me, I moved my head outside thru the window. She was thoroughly concentrating on novel, occasionally she had a look at me. She never tried to talk to me. I was in a confusion, what is this gal thinking of me??? She knew, I am staring at her. She neither gets angry on me nor tries to talk to me. In about 10 min, Nellore is about to come. Once I ve heard from one of my friends, many people will get into the train in Nellore. I was in a kind of bother. Will some one enter into our bay and disturb our privacy. What the hell I am doing.

Nellore came. With a lot of excitement, I gave a look at platform. Train took a standby for 10 min. all these 10 minutes, my heart was in my hand. Train started again. No one entered into our compartment. I took a deep breath. She stopped reading. She was looking outside. With lots of courage (I never ever felt, talking to a gal is so tough),

I said “Hii”

“Hii”, she replied with a cute smile on her face

(I felt happy for her reply. I am already lost in her looks.)

So, where are you going???

I am going to my home. I ll get down at Vijayawada.
(So I have three more hours to flirt this sensation)
Ohh.

You are travelling alone……

Yup, my father said he ll to come to receive me. By the way,you are goin to…

I am going to Hyderabad. What do u do??

I am working as medical representative. And wat abt u…

I am a software engineer.

Ohh.

Each and every aspect of our chat for that half an hour is a dream for me., which I ll cherish for most part of my life. God, she is too cute.

Our conversation lasted for half an hour. After which we had a pause.
In this half an hour, I ve tried to impress her, in every possible way I can. I ve utilized my talent to full extreme, I ve never used my skills to that level even for my office work. I ve made her laugh. I ve praised her language, ( beauty also infact, indirectly, but I think she knew my intention). By the way she was talking to me, I felt like I ve created a very good first impression on her.

Vijayawada came. She took off the blanket over her and began to pack her luggage. She stood up. I am shocked. It was then, I could find she is physically handicapped. one of her legs is broken. For first time in my life, I felt like my heart stopped functioning. I am in a trans. I could not believe my eyes. I was speechless. The pain I was feeling in my heart is, cannot be expressed .

She was about to leave…..her father was waiting for her.

She turned back to me (such a cute face of her lost the charm, her chubby cheeks became red, her eyes were filled with tears) and said (she became so emotional that, she found very hard for herself to manage. she could not utter even a single word. She was crying, somehow she managed to say these words to me) “ naku site kottina first abbayivi nuvve” .